#message me and ill give you a random fact abt him

[ingenves]

     ok its ya girl back at it, same deal ! if u wanna plot just HMU or LIKE THIS and i’ll come to you ! wes is my father & u can peep his pinterest board HERE !

     ⌈ chris pine, cismale, he/him ⌋ hey, is it WESLEY BIGELOW that you’re looking for? you know, the THIRTY-SIX year old CARPENTER. typically i see them hanging around GRISTOL DOCKS so you could try there! i hear they’ve been in living in PRINCETOWN for THIRTY-SIX YEARS. gristol wouldn’t be the same without them, right? anyway, whenever i see them they make me think of waking up before dawn, an old rowboat sitting in still water & a kitchen full of fresh produce.

tw: car accident & illness 

this mans has lived in town his entire life!!! his parents, william and rose bigelow owned a historic farm . willy & rose were high school sweethearts, a shotgun wedding joining them together after rose ended up pregnant with their first child at the age of 19. while rose’s parents were furious with their daughter for being so reckless, william’s father was more than happy to offer them a place to stay and lend a hand taking care of the baby that would soon be on the way.

despite the circumstances, wes was never treated as an accident or a mistake. he grew up in his grandpa’s farmhouse with a loving family. the bigelow family followed some pretty traditional gender roles. wes’ dad and his grandpa would wake at the crack of dawn and work out in the field until sunset while his mother hung around the house to take care of him, doing laundry, making dinner, taking him to the park, everything.

from a young age he was encouraged to help out on the farm but being the mama’s boy he was, he was far more eager to help his mom out with the cooking and the laundry. he was close with his grandfather as well, the two always working on little projects together like building a tree house, birdhouses, his own bee house………………….a lot of houses

but wes was never rly close with his father. william wasn’t much of an emotional or talkative guy, usually just sitting there in stern silence and working the day away. a bit of a scary guy despite not ever doing anything scary?? he’s just an ominous guy that doesn’t rly seem impressed by anything so wes never rly knew where he stood u know.

the one time wes ever really felt close to his father was when they would take little weekend fishing trips together, even though they didn’t really speak. just the fact that william took his time to teach wes how to do everything and didn’t get mad or frustrated when he lost a lure or let a fish go by accident was enough to like…..send the message. that was his way of showing his love u know.

the second bigelow child was welcomed when wes was a kid and while at first he was jealous that his new baby sister was getting all the attention, having a baby around the house was kind of fun. she’d make funny faces and funny noises and he grew to love her pretty quickly. he used to always say that his baby sister was the best thing that happened to him. when she got older, he taught her how to make mud pies and how to play pranks on grandpa who was a rly good sport, all things considered.

car accident & death tw !! the winter of ‘94 would prove to be the worst winter of wes’ entire life. on the way back home to pick up a christmas tree from a nearby farm, the family’s old pick up hit a patch of black ice and ended up flipped into a ditch. it was a bad wreck. luckily his grandpa and sister were safe at home during the time of the crash, but wes and his parents weren’t so lucky, his mother being the unluckiest of the bunch. they were stranded in the middle of the road for two hours before anyone showed up for help and by the time they arrived, it was too late for rose, who got the worst of the injuries. doa at the hospital while wes and his dad walked away with mostly minor injuries. that year, there was no christmas tree and no presents. christmas dinner was replaced with takeout and no one said a word.

illness & death tw !! not long after rose passed away, grandpa bigelow got some bad news. lung cancer that no one really saw coming. just a few months after the diagnosis they were having another funeral for another member of the bigelow clan.

it was a tough year, but they got through it. wes did his job to step up and do all the things his dad couldn’t do; all the things his mother taught him. he expected all of it to make his dad more closed off but it had the reverse effect and for the first time in his entire life, wes and his father had heart to heart conversations.

jump forward to high school and things finally felt like they were back to normal. william wasn’t dating yet but he wasn’t being all that anti-social, either.

wes discovered quickly he was the kind of person that other people liked and he was quite popular??? he made good grades, played football, dating the coolest girl in school (in his own opinion ofc), everything kind of fell into place for him in high school

and then after high school he…………didn’t rly know what to do asdj;fdksgfkdlj he never went to college and decided work around town doing odd jobs and saving some money so he could go off and travel and live his life as a young person craving adventure.

he was gone for abt a year or so before coming back home & he’s just been here ever since, doin his thing

started working with a family friend in his shop, doing what he loved and building things n working with his hands u know and hasn’t stopped doing what he loves ever since

he owns his own shop now & builds custom furniture 

the….personality section has Arrived

he’s quite the Charming guy but he talks WAY too much

definitely the kind of guy who will just…..talk about himself non-stop without even realizing it ?? he needs to get his Ego in check even after all these years smh

buT he’s very good at making conversation and is rly a friendly guy!!!! will talk and joke with anyone just because……why not ?? it makes his day when ppl talk to him so he will talk to u even if u dont feel the same way

highkey the kind of person to start up a random conversation w a stranger in the grocery story just because

lowkey uncomfortable with feelings and still isn’t super great at expressing emotions and his thoughts but ya boi is trying his best

but he’s rly good at picking up on signals. he can’t express his own emotions but he’s like….pretty in tune with other ppl

a very platonically affectionate guy. loves hugging his buddies and telling them how much he loves & appreciates them

and now for the lil extra tidbits

he’s got two dogs. a german shepherd named mulder & a pomeranian named scully sfddgfhgfg and he strategically uses his dogs to flirt w ladies when they’re out on a walk LMAO

he’s got a 6 year old daughter named aspen with a woman he is no longer dating ( im prob gna put this as a wc on the main so if u want this....hmu???? ) but they are still v close and spend a lot of time together & he loves aspen more than anything :’)

he’s very much a Dad. dad jokes all the time. endless shitty puns for everyonE

the man loves a turtleneck. he can’t keep his hands off a good ass sweater u know ??

he loves to cook and is v good at it, since he’s been cooking his entire life. he is the self-proclaimed kind of bbq and honestly???? he’s always throwing lil bbq parties & they are a hit :/  u know he be winning contests w his grilling bro

obviously.........a handyman. the house he lives in now, he built himself after tearing down the old on.  he built himself a nice big deck and everything so he can have a nice place to host bbqs and everyone will come compliment him on hard work and enjoy his fantastic recipes

he runs his own business building & selling furniture!!!! need a shelf installed??? give him a call. dog chewed up ur table leg??? give him a call. house burned down???? give him a call he’ll build u a new one.

what’s better than this ??????????? guys bein dudes

he rly likes going to the movies. lowkey loves disney but pretends he only cares bc his daughter likes it but……….u know he knows the words to every song

tragically heterosexual ://///////

he loves strong coffee & he loves beer & occasionally he loves a good book & a nice game of chess

did i mention he is such a dad bc………..he is such a dad

someone hold his rough sandpaper ass hands

[losergeekvvhatever]

hey hi who wants some thoughts on deh

okay so. i made a smaller post abt the moral of deh but i kinda wanna expand on that so ayy

big long rambly and probably partially-nonsensical deh-loving rant under the cut

here’s the thing about dear evan hansen (and to be clear, “you” is used pretty generally here, obviously this doesn’t apply to everyone but this isn’t fucking MLA so i can write how I want):

the way that a lot of people first get into deh is through the music. no knowledge of the plot, no context, but maybe you listen to the music and you relate to it and you relate to evan. the message, on the surface, is “you will be found.”

and then maybe you find a bootleg, or a plot summary, or maybe you read the script or something. and you realize that all Evan is doing is lying to everyone. you realize that he’s actually kinda being a horrible person!! he’s lying to the Murphy’s about being friends with their dead son, for his own sake.

maybe you get mad. maybe you’re annoyed. maybe you kinda hate Evan now, you think he had what was coming to him, that he deserved those consequences.

but like. you’re supposed to.

cause that’s what this musical is about. cause like, you, the audience member?? you were lied to too. you know nothing about the real Connor, ever. all you get is a couple scenes of him being an asshole and making people hate him and then he’s gone.

so maybe you feel sorry for Connor after he dies. but like, before you found out about that, you probably didn’t care much. maybe you were annoyed with him or you hated him.

... and then he dies. he kills himself.

and then you realize he was struggling.

then, and only then, do you give a shit.

and it’s the same damn story for every person at his school, for every teacher, for his family, for the random people on the internet who had never even heard his name before. they only bother to care when he’s gone.

and i mean, honestly?? they still don’t really give a shit until Evan starts lying. they don’t give a shit until they think there was a ~sweet kind boy~ who was just struggling and lashing out. they don’t care until they can think he’s a good person.

the musical is about mental illness, and it feels real to me. it doesn’t portray it as a beautiful tragedy, it gets ugly and messy.

connor is violent. he is aggressive. he self-medicated because it was literally his only option, cause Larry refused to acknowledge how bad Connor had gotten and nothing Cynthia would do could change that. she tried getting him into therapy and on meds, and Larry took him out of that.

and like, i’ve known people like connor. and it’s pretty damn accurate honestly.

and then there’s evan, who lies because his anxiety gets the better of him and he’s too scared to let the murphys down. and like damn if i haven’t been there. not to that extent but i’ve been there. it sucks. and then things spiral out of control for him, and the lie gets so big that eventually telling the truth would have devastating consequences, so he keeps lying.

but then the truth comes out and he has to own up to that shit. nobody’s gonna accept “sorry my anxiety” as an excuse, no more than they accepted connor’s mental illness as an excuse for his shitty behavior.

know why?

cause it’s not an excuse. it’s a reason, but it didn’t excuse any of it.

so like. there’s two main messages to glean from this:

mental illness is a reason, not an excuse; you still have to apologize for and own up to your shitty behavior.

people often don’t give a shit about someone who’s struggling until they die, and that’s something that really, really needs to change.

taken out of context, “you will be found” is a good song with a good message. and like, i don’t wanna take that away from it. it’s a song that’s helped people; it’s a song that’s helped me. it’s still an important message.

but like, if you think that’s the message of the musical?? then you’re ignoring the fact that it’s literally evan’s speech. as in, the one where he lies.

anyway i feel like a lot of the people who think dear evan hansen is a shitty representation of mental illness are the ones who also take you will be found at face value, and like. there’s so much more than that.

so hopefully i made this make sense.